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  • Writer's picturemichellepinsky

Needy Horny Couple


Once upon a time while living the "California dream" I was looking for a place to rent out. So me being the desperate one I hit up Craigslist because thats what all the cool kids do and instantly regretted it. The first time I posted an ad I stupidly left my phone number on it and immedietely got creepy texts from a couple who wanted to SHARE their queen size bed with them, thats right I said with them and not only that but the woman wanted to SHARE her husband as well. -____- So after a couple of text ignores I then decided to repost that same ad but this time instead of posting my phone number I replaced it with an email to save myself the trouble. Low and behold I got a response no more than 5 minutes from, guess who. Yep, my favorite desperate house couple. So here I share with you their desperation. To this day I wonder if their request was filled.

SUBJECT: Young couple searching for [temp?] live-in friend (Santa Monica)

BODY: hello, we know that this is not exactly what you we looking for....however, we'd still like you to read and if you want - to actually consider this. we are very friendly and considerate and mean you no offense. if this is really not for you, we respect that and wish you all the best!

[if you need this only as a temp situation until you settle in - we are also interested]

$/month Female roommate, PA and more wanted (Santa Monica)

First off - please do not be offended with this email, since we mean none. We just want to offer you a share. If you're totally not interested, then just ignore this (or email us back that you're not interested) and we apologize if it was offensive.

Do you need housing now? We have a great deal for you in Santa Monica.

Here is "symbolic" rent for the right gal who would be open to intimacy with us (or just with the guy - i love to share!). There are a lot of amenities that come with this apartment. practically no rent, free utilities, free cable TV, free internet and more. We are an honest, hardworking, and financially secure couple hoping to find a mutually beneficial relationship with a female roommate. We will share a one-bedroom apartment together (you can sleep with us in our

queen-size bed). Please supply some pics and some personal information. Drugs and disease free, no smoking, and a private quiet life style are the requirements. We do like to have fun! movies, bars, clubs dinners and more (but usually on weekends). during the week we come home so tired we barely prepare dinner. that's where you come in also - helping us out in some

minor household stuff.

We will live 1.5 miles from the beach, and some 10 blocks from third street promenade. close to SMC and bus ride to UCLA. public transportation is right by wilshire and santa monica blvd! Santa Monica is a great city to live in!

anyhow... this is our "standard" email/post.... but we're pretty much open to anything. the most important thing is personality match. to have someone over who can be a friend and that we are on the same page on stuff. other then that, almost everything is a go - this can be a temp thing as you search for your own apartment. like this you know that you have a secure place to stay on the westside, close to everything. the sleeping together every night is obviously not a must. intimacy is great but you would probably like your own place to sleep.

we also do also prefer most nights to sleep alone. so there's the great sofa-bed in the living room. it would be nice sometimes to sleep together so you can cuddle with us :-) nice warm comfortable feeling of security. anyhow, you get our drift - if we're a match we would

like to offer you to live in with us.

in any case - good luck in all!

#funny

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